Weasels ripped my flumps

60% beaver... 19% lawyers first mate (with honours)... 22% bad maths

Moody eyeballs on fishing rods

smoking hemp with my cephlopods

Will wonders never crease?

tackling the peat bogs of yestermorrow

on the never never

Up on cripple creek

Annoyie Mouse

and then... just after that came.... THIS

Up coming events

Everyones favourite cockney fake rogue tough nut Danny Dyer coming to a small screen near you sometime soon

Chunky fat, carrying a few extra folds???

Laugh away that unattractive wobbly flesh with this new and improved chortle type joke... which isn't funny

Electric german neighbours

laughing at ya through the bran flakes

My most favouritist

I like this joke I made pretty much 200% more than anyone else... which is no redundant boast considering everyone subjected to it dislikes it with every fibre in their bodies

Hat? No hat?

Is it a hat day or is it NO?.... votes will be counted at 2.52pm or 14.52 or 7 minutes ago

That reminds me...

....of things

Tea drinking

I started with the horse... I have no clue why the rest got involved

Coming soon, to a tiny screen near you

v

Paternity crish bombardier speckled hen

roger dodger over and trout... seabass.... whelks.....

glinesykimpossiblycheapsmut

Maw-mo

This is becoming popular....

It would appear that some folks I admire from a distance are making these 'influence' charts.
Obviously I thought that it was another attempt by the internet to promote narcissism in a
new and creative way... then I thought ahh bollocks to it....

Can you guess the arters? Do you care? One lump or two?

Corn Ice cream

karambolage